* This was written not long after my return from Melbourne. While away I heard a whole lot about how good my children were but on my return, mere moments after I walked through the door in fact, the girls returned to their screeching, tantruming, non- sleeping ]selves *
Sometimes I wish I could go back and start again; get help from the very start and make different choices along the way.
Sometimes I wish I could go back and NOT start again; become a better, more rounded person first.
Sometimes I wonder where I have gone wrong; why are things the way they are?
Sometimes I think that if I weren't so selfish things would be better; if I wasn't so desperate to be the person at home, raising my children and instead went to work maybe they would have a better life.
Sometimes I wonder why we bothered; wasn't it meant to be better?
Sometimes I feel so completely unsure of what I am doing, where I'm going and what the next step should be that it's overwhelming.
